The Impact on the Future

 I was recently interviewed for an oral history project. Besides it being an honor to be asked,  it was exciting to share my poetry and my experiences in education during (COVID-19) this pandemic.

As I started to think beyond myself, and the deeper implications, I realized that future Scholars will have access to the authentic words, thoughts, and feelings of every teacher-poet that participants in this project.

I thought about several questions: What will they learn form our experiences? How will our words be interpreted / received? Will our poetry adequately depict what we are currently experiencing, what teaching is really like, the current climate, the atmosphere, and the circumstances of this time?

I really hope so. Ii think I can safely say, "Not many of us teachers ever expected that we would have to navigate teaching during a pandemic." I know I didn't.

Being a part of this project makes me proud (in a humble way) that my words are being used to document such a time as this.

I'm Not Going to Take It Anymore (sing it if you know it)

 So...(long pause)...I recently said yes (one of the effects of choosing FEARLESS as my OLW) to an opportunity the quite frankly scares the BEEEEP out of me.

I seem to have a special fear when it comes to the thought, the very thought, of blogging and writing for a professional purpose that so many professionals in my field could potentially read.

I got curious about this fear, (Thanks Jennifer Laffin for the suggestion.), and heres what I came up with...

•     Will people sense my fear as they read my words? 
•     Will they be able to tell how inadequate I feel?
•     Will readers find error/fault with what I have to say?
•     Will they receive the message I intend to transmit?

I know I can't let fear stop me from writing, from putting my words out in the world. I won't let it stop me. I will wear discipline like a cloak, designate a daily write time, and get the words written and published.

So Fear,

Thank you so much for being ever-present. You remind me that I have great things to do. I believe you come around to warn me, but also to hinder my greatness. And, you know what? I'm not going to take it anymore. I will not allow you to stop me. You, Fear, are welcome to move on. You don't have to go home, but have to get the BEEEP out of here. I, too, am moving on...on to GREATNESS.

Deepest Regards,

Donnetta

Care and Concern for All My Babies

 As a mom, it is natural to be concerned for your children from the time they are born until forever. It doesn't matter how old your children get or how capable they become, a mom never stops thinking about and worrying about her children.

My 22 years old is a full-time student and soon-to-be graduate of The University of Texas Austin and works a full-time job. The thought her zipping in and out of Austin traffic on I-35 and her having to come home after dark alone keeps me in constant prayer for her safety and well-being.

My 13 years old loves skateboarding, playing video games and being social with his friends. Unfortunately, COVID has required us to strategize his social life. We allow him to spend time at our local skate park, because at least it's outside. I worry, however, that he and the teenagers he meets up with are not always social distancing. Lord, please help him make wise choices and keep him COVID-free.

My 7 month old loves playing fetch, rolling in and eating the grass, and sticking as close to me as possible. He had to go to the emergency room due to a laceration on his ear. I was not thrilled that I had to drop him off and leave him. I wasn't convinced they would take good-enough care of him. He was visibly apprehensive as I handed over his leash, and my heart was heavy until he was back in my cared.

Whether it's my two biological babies or my fur-baby, my worry, care and concern for them will always be the same.

My JOYS of 2020

 My JOYS of 2020

During the month of November I wrote 30 #gratikus about the people, place and things for which I am grateful. I featured some of my poems in a previous post. 

I enjoyed writing these haikus every day, because I learned to slow down, pay attention, and capture moments in time (in the present) that made me be present in the moment.

For the month of December I am reflecting on 31 days of JOY-filled moments from throughout 2020. I have looked back through notebooks and scrolled through photos to recollect and relive the excitement and joy felt at that time.

Despite all that COVID has brought with it in 2020, I am choosing to end this year reflecting on all that is and was good. 

One of my greatest JOYs from 2020 was becoming a member of the #100daysofnotebooking Facebook group, because I developed a daily writing habit.

I wrote a notebook entry every day for the first 100 days of 2020 and beyond, and I have continued to this day. I am proud to be ending this year the way I started it...writing.

The notebooks that have captured my JOYS of 2020.

 

I Feel Pretty

 There was a time

when I would spend all day

on a Saturday

getting my hair done.

I remember feeling so pretty afterward.

    

 

As I have gotten older,

time has gotten more valuable.

I spend about 25 minutes

in the barber's chair.

I leave feeling just as pretty.

Hard Is Hard

Hard is Hard

I'm not sure which is harder...

• Teaching remotely and trying to get Scholars to respond during the "We Do" portion of the "district/campus-mandated" Gradual Release of Responsibility Model.
  

OR

• Seeing someone hurting and not being able to put your arms around them and attempt to assure them everything will be okay.

BOTH are equally hard. One, mentally. One, emotionally.

In that moment, I did what I could. I stood 3 feet away, cried with her, and prayed.

Feng Shui

Feng Shui

Writing Toward Home by Georgia Heard

"...a place steeped in creative energy and harmony."

"Feng Shui is intertwined with the Chinese idea of ch'i or 'life force'."

There are primarily 3 places, spaces in and around my home that I find have the balance and harmony required for my getting words on the page.

1. My home office with its grayish-green walls, towering bookcases, and random (not-so-random) clutter.

2. The right side, the right cushion of "my" oversized couch. My pillow, borrowed from the downstairs guest room, and my silk blanket lay in that space when I am not there. They are a constant reminder of the coziness and comfiness I experience when I plant my butt in that space to write. (Naps may or may not happen on occasion on "my" couch, also.)

3. There are times, when Texas is not located directly next to the sun, in which I will spend some time on my back patio, enjoying the sights and sounds of nature while I write.

Maybe, once Coronavirus is no longer a thing (if ever), I can add more places and spaces of balance and harmony to this list.